The Right To Be Heard

“Oh…You just won’t listen, that’s all.” Dorothy Gale, The Wizard of Oz

Have you ever asked yourself something like “Why won’t anybody listen to me?”  Maybe you feel like no one hears what you’re trying to say.  That feeling breeds frustration which can turn into depression as you begin to wonder if anybody even cares.  Regardless of who we are, none of us wants to feel invisible.

We live in a noisy world and the volume is constantly increasing.  The airwaves were already cluttered before we started swimming in the Twitter Stream and digesting Facebook feeds.  We’re drowning in information and bloated.  Life is wildly hectic for many who are too busy and can’t stop.

This struggle is highlighted during the Christmas season in today’s culture.  The once simple idea of hustle and bustle now makes us cringe as we face the pressures of the holiday.  Rest and relaxation are hardly likely with so many places to go and people to please.  What happened and can we fix it?

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Remember spinning on the merry-go-round at the playground when you were a kid?  All you wanted was to get going fast.  Everything was so exciting as you dug in and took off.  Then things started going a little too fast and that grip began to slip.  You were spinning out of control and just wanted it to stop but there was no way to get off without getting hurt.  That’s the point at which the perception of being invisible turns to despair because no one comes to your rescue.

Photo Credit: NASA/Sean Smith

Our lives are like that when we set things in motion–plans for achieving goals and dreams–yet lose control during those critical turning points.  You can’t shut down that kind of momentum in an instant or someone’s going to get hurt.  The only way to get yourself back under control is by getting a firm grasp and gradually slowing down.

Lord knows I never expected to break down the philosophy of the band Hoobastank, but they have a song that really smacked me in the brain a while back.  Part of that song is about being let down by somebody we expected to be there.  When those people don’t come through we feel alone and everything starts to spin “out of control.”  It’s scary when we do everything we were supposed to do only to get blindsided in the end.

After a letdown like that we feel ignored and alone like Dorothy before she left Kansas.  When that happens we just want to pack up our problems and head for Pity City in hopes that someone there will listen.

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We had this saying when I was with Young Life that you have to earn the right to be heard.  Nothing is earned without effort.  Influence is at the heart of this idea, and you can’t influence anyone without being respected.  So how does this all tie together?

12 Days of Christmas Movies: End of Quarterfinals

Gremlins took out the Grinch yesterday and we’re down to the final matchup of this internationally renowned first round.  I haven’t taken much heat so far but after today there’s no going back.  If you’ve been waiting for a particular movie and it doesn’t come through now you’ll know.

Now that we’re down to it I’m getting nervous.  My palms are sweatier than chestnuts roasting over an open menorah (I’m so PC).  Think of all the movies left to consider.  I’m bypassing The Nightmare Before Christmas and my beloved Muppets!  What about movies that never die like Miracle on 34th Street and A Christmas Carol?  I even considered Die Hard, The Holiday, and The Family Stone.  Shoot, you could even make an argument for The Santa Clause or The Polar Express.

I would love to know what movie you can’t believe I left off, but we’re talking iconic fixtures here people, a mixed bag of Hammertime that’s too legit to quit.  I’m talking about eduClaytion immortality.  I’m talking about something that Potter can’t get his fingers on and it’s galling him.  That’s right.  The movies I’m talking about are

The 12 Days of Christmas Movies Creature Feature!

There may have been no creatures stirring in my house last night, but a few folks were stirred to vote for A Christmas Story whilst I slept and Scrooged has been knocked out of this here tournament. 

Speaking of creatures, today I bring you a faceoff filled with them.  We have the all-time gift gone wrong plot and a character who wants all the presents for himself.  We’re going with Gremlins vs. How The Grinch Stole Christmas.

Click to enlarge

I could just throw that matchup on the floor and walk away, but this is eduClaytion and I haven’t blown your minds with knowledge much this week so let’s try some of that, a little Wiki Wednesday omage if you will.

One of the top all-time grossing creature features (behind the Jurassic Parks), Gremlins did it on half as many screens.  Imagine how much money that flick would grab today.  Gremlins set the standard for film merchandising and franchising and also led (along with Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom) the MPAA to create the PG-13 rating.  The film was also pioneering in the newer combination of horror and comedy (which I love).  On top of all that we have an early Corey Feldman appearance.

But the man I really want to talk about is Frank Welker.  Who’s that you ask?  Well, he may be the richest actor in history.  You won’t recognize his face but billions of people know his voice, or should I say voices?  No, he was not the voice of the Mogwai Gizmo, that was Howie Mandel.  Welker was the voice of the villainous Spike. 

Let’s see, who else has Welker voiced?  Oh yeah, how about Scooby-Doo, Scooby’s pal Fred (since 1969), Garfield, and most of the Transformers in the 1980s.  Don’t forget Slimer from Ghostbusters and a couple of the Smurfs.  You can also add the monkey Abu from Aladdin, Dr. Claw from Inspector Gadget, and Darkseid from Super Friends.  And those are only some of his roles.  Are you kidding me?  Frank Welker spent more time in my childhood than all my teachers combined!

I’ve gone out of my way to avoid campaigning for any particular film here, and I don’t want to break that trend now.  Anyone who knows me can tell you how I feel about Jim Carrey.  When the announcement was made that he would play the Grinch I immediately received phone calls.  I have never enjoyed Dr. Seuss more than during the 2000 film How The Grinch Stole Christmas.  The movie smashed the box office and made me laugh.

Believe me, if I was confused about how yesterday’s matchup would go I am downright clueless as to what might happen here.  Dispute my choices if you will, but I feel pretty confident placing these two picks into an elite field, especially when you consider cultural impact.  Maybe I’m just not a Miracle on 34th Street type guy (a problematic film since there are two versions).  Maybe you’ll see that pick tomorrow during for the final go of these quarter finals.  I guess my life is just a lot more Frank Welker than Bing Crosby.

So there’s your “bet you didn’t know” portion of the week.  One thing you can be sure of though is how you will vote.  And you click right now.

The 12 Days of Christmas Movies Part 2

Well, Clark Griswold took down Buddy the Elf and it wasn’t even close in day 1 of The 12 Days of Christmas Movies tournament.  Perhaps that was too easy.  Today brings a tougher decision for fans of some 80s classics.

Today’s matchup features A Christmas Story vs. Scrooged.  I don’t think I’ll get much argument on including these two flicks.

A Christmas Story has a lot of fans.  I know a lot of peeps that love the story of the boy who just wanted a gun from Santa.

Scrooged is another quotable gem that should be watched year after year.  Bill Murray is hilarious, and you’re guaranteed to laugh out loud.

But what say you dear voter?  The eduClaytion electorate has the final say in which of these movies will make it to next week’s semis.  I really have no clue how this will go, so have at it.  Every vote counts so click, comment, and come back to see what we’ve wrought.

Remember that you can click the bracket to enlarge and press the ‘eduClayte Me’ button to the right to get instant updates by email as we go.

The 12 Days of Christmas Movies Begins!

What is the greatest Christmas movie of all time?  That’s the simple question for anyone pointing and clicking on this site in the next 12 days. 

While lining up some Friday Flick Faceoffs the thought crossed my thought-crossed little mind that a couple of movies would have to go to the showdown before Christmas.  But then a few more movies came to mind.  Solution?  A little Christmas movie madness, single-elimination bracket style.

Kicking off the week are a couple of comedies.  National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation vs. Elf.  The Griswold family Christmas is legendary.  I seem to quote the thing year round.  Elf is a relative newcomer to the season but super popular and a worthy challenger in the field.

All these movies are well known but I’m sure there will be complaints about something left off.  You’ll just have to wait and see if your pick made the cut.  Most of all, will your pick be able to emerge victorious in the end?

Voting for each matchup will run on a 24 hour cycle, so you can check back the next day to see the results of the round and vote for the next faceoff.  By Thursday of this week we’ll be down to the final four.  Semifinals start next Monday and the final showdown will be on Thursday, December 23rd.  The winner will be announced on Christmas Eve.

My regular article for this week will appear on Friday.  Wiki Wednesday is gonna take a couple weeks off for a holiday break, but I’ll be sprinkling some of the finer moments of the month around here and there.  You can use the button on the right to subscribe and get updates by email.

So let’s get to it and rock some yuletide movies.  Spread the news and spread some cheer.  Spread seems like a strange word if you say it repeatedly but I digress.  Now, it’s on you.  The future of holiday moviedom is at stake.

[Note: You can click the bracket for a larger version. Feel free to print these and post them around your town as millions of peeps will no doubt crave the information.]

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Cast your vote anyway you like and don’t worry if you’ve seen the movies or not cause in a true democracy you only need a pulse to participate.  Love to hear why you picked what you picked in the comment section.

FFF: Some Christmas Cartoon Classics

I’m awfully excited about a special eduClaytion event starting on Monday.  You are going to help determine the greatest holiday film of all time in The 12 Days of Christmas Movies.  I’ve had a tough time setting the field over the past few weeks, but we’ll be in good shape. 

Today’s Friday Flick Faceoff gives you a chance to get warmed up for next week’s voting.  Today’s picks aren’t full-length movies, but they certainly are legendary.  I honestly don’t know how this one will shake out because the contestants are pretty popular.  If you think these picks are tough just wait until next week. 

I’m attaching links to each of the titles so you can reminisce and make your pick, so be sure to vote and enjoy!

How The Grinch Stole Christmas

Everyone loves Max

Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer

A dentist? I mean really.

A Charlie Brown Christmas

You're the Charlie Browniest

Frosty The Snowman

This story is kind of dark, eh?

UPDATE: Well, it looks like the Grinch is taking the title for classic cartoon Christmas king.  Now onto the big boys starting Monday, December 13th. Be sure to get your votes in!

The Friday Flick Faceoff features films that somehow share a common thread.  Cast your vote anyway you like and don’t worry if you’ve seen the movies or not cause in a true democracy you only need a pulse to participate.  Love to hear why you picked what you picked though.

John Milton, Paradise Lost & My Two Dads

Humankind has spent eons searching for paradise.  Famed English poet John Milton, who would’ve turned 402 tomorrow, wrote of Paradise Lost in 1667, he said, to justify the ways of God to man.  Maybe he should’ve written in English we could understand.  Just kidding (no I’m not).  We are questioning creatures so often searching for answers and meaning.

Two anti-establishment Johns: Milton & Lennon

This week has historically been a week when Americans have sought to understand tragic events, none more so than the attacks on Pearl Harbor on this date in 1941.  That’s the day 2,400 Americans were killed in a surprise attack on the Hawaiian naval base by Japan.  The next day President Franklin Roosevelt made his famous speech to Congress in which he declared that the 7th of December was “…a date which will live in infamy.”  America immediately declared war on Japan.

More questioning took place on this date in 1980 when John Lennon was murdered.  Fans of the famous musician were devastated at the senseless shooting.  December 8th is also the birthday of another tragic musician, Jim Morrison, frontman for The Doors who never found paradise himself but rather overdosed in a bathtub in France years before Lennon was killed in New York.

New York was also the hometown of Sammy Davis, Jr. who was also born on December 8th.  So was Sam Kinison, another performer to die young.  A lot of people remember Kinison as the screaming professor in Back To School with Rodney Dangerfield who also appeared in Caddyshack as a nemesis to Judge Elihu Smails played by Mary Tyler Moore alum Ted Knight.  Knight, whose birthday would’ve been yesterday, actually dropped out of high school to enlist for military service in World War II following the Pearl Harbor attack.

In between fighting Nazis and battling gophers, Knight made various television appearances in the 1980s as did Mr. Dick Butkus who celebrates his 68th birthday tomorrow.  After a Hall of Fame career in the NFL, Butkus moved into acting.  Sure he appeared on shows like Growing Pains, MacGyver, and Magnum P.I. but real die hards of the 1980s remember his role as Ed Klawicki in that epic show My Two Dads.  Yes, I had a crush on the show’s young star Staci Keanan when I was a kid, and yes I was relieved that Step By Step kept her on TV through the 90s, but I feel we’ve drifted away from the legendary prose of Milton here.

Well, it made sense at the time.

Milton went blind during his life and so shared a special interest in the ancient hero Samson, the Old Testament strongman who was betrayed by his woman Delilah and captured by the Philistines who gouged out his eyes and held him prisoner.  In Samson Agonistes, Milton recounts the betrayal.

“I yielded, and unlocked her all my heart, Who with a grain of manhood well resolved Might easily have shook off all her snares: But foul effeminancy held me yoked Her bond-slave.”

Now, I don’t know if that kind of talk would’ve worked on Staci Keanan when I was 13 but Dick Butkus could really appreciate a tough guy like Samson.  By the way, Butkus was from Illinois, the same state from which Barack Obama was a senator until winning the White House in 2008.  On December 9th of that same year, Governor Rob Blagojevich was arrested for attempting to sell the president’s vacated senate seat.  Classy move.  Reminds me of the “obdurate pride” that Milton once wrote about.

Photo of Jack Schmitt by Gene Cernan w/ Earth in background

Well, onto happier times for Illinois as we come to Mr. Gene Cernan, native of “The Prairie State.”  He captained the final Apollo mission, number 17, which departed earth on December 7, 1972.  A few days later he became the last human to step foot on the surface of the moon.  As the crew departed our planet, they snapped the famous “Blue Marble” picture.

Maybe man will one day achieve those lofty heights again and regain what those who went there have called paradise.  The images are amazing and make sense of Milton’s words: “The broad circumference Hung on his shoulders like the moon…”  You just don’t find writing like that in 1980s television, but I bet John Lennon would have approved.

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On Wikipedia Wednesday I take the Wiki’s word for it about what happened on this date in history (give or take a day) and vamp up the rest to connect the events.  It’s okay.  I’m a trained historian. You won’t get history like this anywhere else.

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Did you learn somethin’? Follow me on Twitter @eduClaytion.

The Tangled Web I’ve Woven (Scenes of Humiliation Included)

Well, it’s my birthday. I’m not going to tell you how old I turn today, but I have been 32 for the past year. Birthdays tend to bring out the philosopher in me (see last year’s Boob Jobs and The End Of The World), but this year I’m thinking about hair in part, center part specifically.

It all started with the recent release of Disney’s Tangled. Facebooker Lin first made the observation that the movie’s character Flynn Ryder looks like me. Then I started hearing the same thing from one person after the next, people who don’t know each other, lots of people. I became intrigued. Could be the mannerisms or brown eyes but mostly I think it’s the hair.

I’m realizing that people don’t really part their hair down the center anymore. I’m also realizing that I never change. One of my students, a fashionista perhaps, told me that I have that 90s hair. I asked her what 90s hair is. She raised her brow and pointed to my head. Oh. I started to question my hairstyle when it occurred to me that I don’t have a hairstyle, I just have hair. It just flops around. I got curious about this feature as I realized I never change. I’m just me, always have been. How long has this been so?

Being a professional historian, I knew right where to go for the answers: Wikipedia. No, I’m kidding. I went to my dear Aunt’s massive archive of family photos. You’ve never seen anything like it. I needed directions to begin. When I asked where I could find photos of my upbringing she pulled out a map and two skeleton keys. Behold, my youth.

My sisters were doomed. How can you compete with this?

I was working by age 8. Bought my own Nintendo. Boo-yeah.

Home haircut, interrogation room style. Notice the shame.

I'm probably thinking about math not the hair.

I knew early on I would need wit and social skills to make it through school alive.

Grandparents at 10th bday. Notice my carefully kempt hair.

Ah, the duck flop, a complex style of Dippity Do gel and a side part.

Despite passing birthdays I don't seem to change, hair included.

You can see how I’ve always been so fashionably sensitive. We had a complex method for picking our outfits out each day based on a formula of grabbing clothes we owned and then wearing them. As for the hair, I eventually settled into a meticulous regimin of not cutting my hair and tucking it behind my ears. Step 1? Grow a mullet.

Good Luck, We’re All Counting On You

A few weeks ago I stumbled into the second floor of an old bookstore in Erie.  I noticed a book on a shelf marked humor and thumbed the pages.  The title said The Naked Truth by Leslie Nielsen.  I’m a sucker for comedic brilliance shrouded in ridiculous humor, so I bought the mostly fake autobiography.

Nielsen died last week in his Florida home at the age of 84.  Hard to believe he was already in his 50s when he teamed up with the Zucker-Abraham team for some zany 80s work like Airplane.  He was over 60 when the first Naked Gun movie was made.  Lots of people hated everything he ever did.  That’s fine.  I think the works produced by that group were as close as we may ever see again to Marx Brothers type comedy.

Nielsen's one of my favorite Canadians.

I don’t think I ever laughed so hard as I did when I was 19 or so and first saw the six episodes of Police Squad from 1982, the television series that led to the Naked Gun movies a few years later.  The opening credits alone always get me with a guest star that dies before the show begins and a narrator that announces something completely different than the title on screen.

In one of my favorite moments, this simple exchange takes place as someone enters a room to find Frank Drebin (Neilsen) snooping around.

Dutch: Who are you and how did you get in here?

Drebin: I’m a locksmith.  And, I’m a locksmith.

Call me simple but that’s great.  Maybe you’re more familiar with the one-liners from Airplane like:

Ted Striker: Surely you can’t be serious!

Dr. Rumack: I am serious and don’t call me Shirley.

No one had a better deadpan delivery.  Ever.  I love how everyone was so clueless, like Julie Hagerty as Elaine Dickinson.

Dr. Rumack [Nielsen]: You’d better tell the Captain we’ve got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.

Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it?

Dr. Rumack: It’s a big building with patients, but that’s not important right now.

Ah, say what you will, but that stuff keeps you young.  Also I learned jive from watching that movie so cut me some slack jack.

So this week’s Friday Flick Faceoff was easy to set up after hearing the news last week.  After 25 years of serious portrayals Nielsen switched it up for his most memorable characters.  I can’t tell how this one will go or when it will end.

Nielsen: Well, can’t you take a guess?

Me: Not for another two days.

Nielsen: You can’t take a guess for another two days?

Wonderful.

The Friday Flick Faceoff features films that somehow share a common thread.  Cast your vote anyway you like and don’t worry if you’ve seen the movies or not cause in a true democracy you only need a pulse to participate.  Love to hear why you picked what you picked though.

A Punk Rock Terminator?

On Wikipedia Wednesday I take the Wiki’s word for it about what happened on this date in history (give or take a day) and vamp up the rest to connect the events.  It’s okay.  I’m a trained historian. You won’t get history like this anywhere else.

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“Hello.  My name is Inigo Montoya.  You killed my father.  Prepare to die.”  Few movie lines are as memorable to my generation as that one, uttered by Mandy Patinkin in The Princess Bride.  I’m surprised at how many people have not seen this movie.  There are films that people say you’ve gotta see, and then there is The Princess Bride.  If you haven’t seen it yet, go.  Right now.  We‘ll wait.

Now then, where were we?  (That’s a reference to Peter Falk who played grandpa in TPB but I digress).  The Wiki has led us this Wednesday to a more people driven look through time.  For example, Patinkin’s birthday was yesterday, November 30th, and he has plenty of company.  Winston Churchill (1874) and Mark Twain (1835) shared that birthday.

But let us come to the real link of the day, director Ridley Scott who shares the same birthday.  Scott is known for many films.  Alien, Gladiator, and this year’s Robin Hood come to mind.  In order to make a film about Robin Hood, Scott had to really know his stuff including legendary British monarchs like Henry I who just happened to die on this date in 1135.

I’m not sure how much Henry I had in common with Henry Ford besides a first name, but they were both mighty powerful.  Ford solidified his empire forever on December 1, 1913 when his motor company introduced the first moving assembly line.  The world would literally never be the same.

Automobiles helped make America great but have also spelled tragedy for some.  As a matter of fact, another one of the November 30 birthday boys nearly lost a leg in a 1990 car wreck.  His name is William Michael Albert Broad but you know him better as Billy Idol.   Most people don’t think of Idol as an actor.  Sure he was in The Wedding Singer with Adam Sandler and you may even remember his appearance alongside Jim Morrison (Val Kilmer) in The Doors.  But did you know he was supposed to be the T-1000 in Terminator 2: Judgment Day?  Director James Cameron even had storyboards with Billy Idol as the liquid metal machine.  How different our perception would be of Idol had he not been in that accident.  The effects of that time are still around today.  The man who eventually replaced Idol as T-1000, Robert Patrick, was tapped again by Cameron last year for one of the all-time mega (and horribly overrated) movies, Avatar.

My hero weighs the options: Archaeologist or professor?

So instead of acting fame, we remember Idol for songs like Rebel Yell.  The most notorious Rebels I can think of fought for the South during the Civil War.  Perhaps no man despised those Rebels more than John Brown, a vigilante willing to kill in order to stop slavery.  My students and I still aren’t sure if he was a heroic martyr or psychopathic madman, but he played a big part in bringing the country to a decision point after his raid on Harper’s Ferry in West Virginia.  For that failed slave revolt, he was captured and executed by hanging on December 2, 1859.  Now you’ll understand why the United Nations has designated tomorrow as the International Day for the Abolition of Slavery.

John Brown is also known for murdering a couple of slave-supporting settlers in “Bleeding Kansas,” named for a border war in Missouri and surrounding territories.  Some years later, in 1884, a man named Harrison Ford was born in that state.  Despite becoming an actor on the silent screen and stage this man actually holds no relation to the actor of the same name that we all know today.  Here’s where it really gets wild.  The original Harrison (not Henry) Ford died on December 2, 1957.  Sure, that’s the anniversary of John Brown’s death but this Ford died from injuries sustained in a (wait for iittt) car accident. 

Oh, what a tangled web we weave.  Well, we at least got us some crazy connections, so here’s a final one for ya.  Of the two Harrison Fords in Hollyweird history, you know I was majorly influenced by the latter for his role as Indiana Jones.  I wanted to be him, but the archaeologist thing didn’t work out, so I ended up being a professor instead.  One out of two ain’t bad.  But that’s not the final piece because many people remember Ford for his role in a Sci-Fi cult classic called Bladerunner, the 1982 movie directed by?  You guessed it–Ridley Scott.

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Did you learn somethin’? Follow me on Twitter @eduClaytion.

Terrible Students & The Teachers Who Deal With Them

Prepare for the season of excuses and lame rationalization. Now that Thanksgiving break is over, we enter the time of the year when millions of students suddenly realize how much trouble their grades are in.

Maybe those holiday dinner conversations hit a little too close to home when the family asks how the semester is going. Maybe it’s just the fact that only a few days of December remain until the final marks are made. Panic begins to set in for the unprepared student, a stark realization that research papers and final exams are about to come due. So much to do in so little time!

Some students buckle down and get it done, others give it the old college try before fading, and still more will decide that it’s just not worth it. I understand all this from my time as a bad student, good student, and teacher. One of the amazing things about teaching is how much student behavior you can predict as the years go by. So much changes in culture but slacker students stay the same.

I’m not going to go on too much about this as today’s short video will sum it up for you. Let me just say I am not talking about every student who has ever failed here. Some teachers are horrible and their students may really be doomed. Some classes are insanely hard although no one who puts in the effort should ever fail. No, I’m talking about students who just don’t care until the bill for their ignorance comes due.

I am stunned but not surprised when students come to me after bombing the whole course. They want to know what they can do to fix it. I never heard from them one time despite repeated attempts on my part to meet with them and discuss ways to make up points. Some of these students even wait until the final grades post and then act as if they’re shocked that they failed despite missing almost every test question of the year!

If you’re a student and you’ve blown it this far, just put away distractions for a couple of weeks (even Call of Duty and partying) and start hammering the work. If all else fails then plea for mercy. Simply admit if you screwed up and ask for grace. It may not save you but is the right way to go about things. Don’t come with weak excuses and don’t blame other people. Most of all, don’t tell your teacher that your failure is their fault! Trust me on this one, even if you do have a lousy teacher.

You have to really try to fail in my course. I have helped so many students achieve because they put in effort and communicated with me. They cared. Many of these successful students actually face real tough challenges, yet they do what it takes. We teachers can also help you if you’ve been flirting with worst student ever status but decide to change.  Second chances are important. They help build relationships and create teachable moments. I want all my students to get As.

That said, we’ll always have some students who just don’t care. They come and go all the time. The strange part is when they show up at the end of the year asking questions. That’s what this video is about. Have you ever experienced anything like this? I can hardly call this encounter fictional.

The Assassin’s Jukebox

Ruby shoots Oswald (Image via Wikipedia)

On Wikipedia Wednesday I take the Wiki’s word for it about what happened on this date in history (give or take a day) and vamp up the rest to connect the events.  It’s okay.  I’m a trained historian.

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Putting another dime in the jukebox won’t get you too far anymore baby, but these days you can get a song download credit for a buck all because someone got the first jukebox into operation on November 23, 1889.  Music would never be the same once the world figured out how to spin the black circle.  That first music machine appeared at the Palais Royale Saloon in San Francisco, the town where Joltin’ Joe DiMaggio grew up.

Joey D. was born in 1914 on the 25th of November.  Also born that day was JFK Jr. (1960) who spent a sad third birthday watching his assassinated father get buried in Arlington Cemetery in 1963.  You don’t have to be an English major to pick up on the ironic connections between DiMaggio and JFK.  Start with Marilyn Monroe, Joe’s wife before she became Kennedy’s whatever.  If you want another spooky connection, consider the fact that DiMaggio and John Jr. both died in 1999.  

On that same day in November 1963, Lee Harvey Oswald–suspected assassin of the president–was shot and killed at the Dallas police headquarters by Jack Ruby.  The shooting was broadcast on live television.  Life magazine famously ran a controversial issue featuring Oswald with a rifle on the cover.  (By the way, the NRA first organized in New York City on Nov. 24, 1871).  The first issue of that mag came out this week in 1936.

A couple years after the assassination, in 1966, Life produced great pictures of the smoggiest day in New York City history.  The killer smog took out hundreds who died as a result of respiratory failure and heart attack.  All the city’s great landmarks, places like Carnegie Hall, were buried beneath that polluted haze. 

Speaking of Carnegie, that kind of smog would not have phased the building’s benefactor, industrialist Andrew Carnegie who was born on this date in 1835.  Probably more than anyone else, Carnegie helped make Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania what it became.  By the way, the city of Pittsburgh really got it’s start on November 25, 1758 when British forces defeated the French at Fort Duquesne and rebuilt Fort Pitt from which my beloved hometown grew.    

Carnegie Hall was built in 1891.  A century later (1991), on this very date, Freddy Mercury of Queen and Eric Carr of KISS both died.  Not exactly the day the music died but fans of 1970s and 80s rock sure noticed.

From the 1980s we can head back to the 1880s when two legends–Boris Karloff (1887) and Harpo Marx (1888)–were born one year apart on November 23.  The original Hollywood Frankenstein, Karloff would’ve made a killing during our modern era of vampire and zombie obsession.  Harpo was part of the greatest comedy team in history, and if you don’t get the Marx Brothers you’ll probably never get me.

One last fella who shared that birthday was Billy the Kid (1859).  He was shot and killed in 1881, however, and never got to see one of those new-fangled jukeboxes in the saloons he so often frequented.  And to think he had just turned 21.

This stuff helps keep you young.  Thanks to WitherRiding.

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Yes, I know it was also Miley Cyrus’ birthday. No, I don’t care. Thrill me with your comments! Follow me on Twitter @eduClaytion.

A Classroom Survival Guide For Teachers & Students

A nasty argument broke out during one of my first ever college classes between a squeaky, angry freshman and the teacher who would become the greatest professor I ever had. I don’t remember what started it, but Forsythe often rocked the boat, even while teaching basic English skills.

The student jumped out of his seat and began shouting, something about how Forsythe was trying to keep the black man down. The suggestion was ludicrous of a man who had played ball with and personally known Jackie Robinson in the Brooklyn Dodgers organization before spending time in Africa as a teacher for the Peace Corps. The squeaky one was put in his place and gradually disappeared from the background cast of my collegiate life.

I try to avoid scenes like this one.

That incident became the first in a series of classroom quarrels throughout this second half of my life spent on college campuses. (I could write a book on my mentor Dr. Madden). I would witness many more outbursts as a student before becoming a teacher. Now I’ve got a well-rounded perspective as the number of years I’ve spent in front of the room are equaling the time spent in those uncomfortable seats. I’ve gone against professors as a student and had students come against me as the professor. In between, I’ve seen plenty of students go at each other.

Some of this interaction is healthy and useful, some not so much. I often let the debate get heated when something productive is likely to occur. Any teacher of politics and government is going to see some fiery things in this contentious age in which we live. With so many dead and boring classrooms around, I’ll take liveliness as much as I can get it and often find ways to get students going.

Other teachers don’t always appreciate my “lively” classroom. They’re just jealous cause their students wish they were in our room. Sometimes these professors glare in my window. One lady walked down the hall to pull my door shut while shooting me the evil eyebrow. Others just find me in the hall to tell me what an “interesting discussion” they happened to overhear.

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I’ve seen arguments flirt with getting physical in just about every year I’ve taught. Not good. Regardless of what type of room you find yourself in, here are the basic rules of classroom etiquette that every student (and teacher) should follow to avoid disaster and optimize the learning experience.

Civility? Jolly good.

1) Watch your language.

Everytime I get a student obnoxious enough to unleash a steady flow of vulgar language I hear from many others that such behavior must stop. I watch cringing faces as the obscenities begin and for good reason. It’s a classroom not a comedy club. This rule isn’t just about cursing either. Vulgar language includes all types of sexually offensive talk and more that kills the environment. If you need to be controversial and want people to hate you just get a job in government.

2) Be respectful of others.

Hopefully you’ve been told this by someone in your life. I teach in an urban setting with people from all over the world and every walk of life. Diverse classrooms are the best but you need to speak respectfully. Don’t announce that the Japs got nuked or “fags need to stop whining.” Yes, the quotes are there because I’ve heard it. Yes, there was at least one gay student in the room.

FFF: Thanksgiving Candy

What’s the best Thanksgiving movie of all-time?  I just couldn’t think of many off the top of my head.  Also, I might have been limited to comedies.  So after consulting our great and powerful oracle that is Google, the answer struck me in the form of one of the most famous lines of the 1980s: “Those aren’t pillows!”

That line was delivered in the funniest Thanksgiving movie of all time.  Planes, Trains, and Automobiles came out in 1987 with Steve Martin to create one of the all-time classic duos.  The two have to find their way home in time for the holiday.  The classic comedy still comes up with folks like Zach Galifianakis who just released a buddy comedy of his own with Robert Downey, Jr. in Due Date. 

P, T, and A was written by John Hughes, one of the greatest screenwriters in history.  Check out his IMDB resume in case you don’t realize how many classics he wrote before his own untimely death last year.

Hughes and Candy actually teamed up for a few projects.  The two other famous films were The Great Outdoors and Uncle Buck.  Most people have seen some or all of these gems.  They’re packed full of great lines by characters we adore.  I’m starting to get distracted thinking about the Old 96er, so I better get to the poll.

Starting with a Thanksgiving classic and moving into a trifecta tribute to John Hughes and John Candy, which of these three do you pick as your favorite for this Friday Flick Faceoff?  Tough choice but you only get one.  Go.

The Friday Flick Faceoff features films that somehow share a common thread.  Cast your vote anyway you like and don’t worry if you’ve seen the movies or not cause in a true democracy you only need a pulse to participate.  Love to hear why you picked what you picked though.

Related Articles

• 10 Holiday Movies That Make Your Family Seem Normal (bestcollegesonline.net)
• Soundtrack Saturday: “Planes, Trains and Automobiles” (popdose.com)
• ‘Due Date’ – old Hollywood wine in new bottle (IANS Movie Review – Rating: **) (topinews.com)
• Lessons learned from ‘Planes, Trains and Automobiles’ (msnbc.msn.com)
• Actors We Miss: John Candy (moviefone.com)

Does Uncle Sam Want To Put His Hand Down Your Pants?

An eduClaytion special report 😮

The guy had my attention when he told Uncle Sam not to touch his “junk.”  As soon as the John Tyner video went viral Monday, I knew I better get educated because the questions would be coming since I’m supposed to know my stuff.  About government and politics, that is, not junk touching. 

Airport screening has become the dominant issue lately since the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) changed course to allow for aggressive pat downs in addition to the infamous body scanners.  The government groping is already being compared to sexual molestation while scanners have been criticized for providing nude images of passengers and possibly dosing folks with harmful radiation.

Since I’ve already been asked about these happenings a few times, I thought I might quickly lay out what’s happening, what should be happening, and what the Constitution says about it all.

Background

Since the attacks of 9/11, the U.S. government has gradually increased security measures to react to recent plots.  Someone mentioned liquid explosives so we got rid of water bottles.  After the shoe bomber, we had to take off our shoes.  Then it was laptops, then belts, and on it went. 

Then last Christmas some jerk put explosives in his underwear, so now we have to check underwear even though terrorists are always onto the next thing.  The new thing is no doubt going to be explosives hidden in body cavities that won’t be detected by body scanners or feel-ups, but that’s for another day.

The Government’s Plan

Initially, I think the government wanted to invite all of us over for dinner and drinks to seduce us out of our clothes.  Bill Clinton probably would’ve been tapped as the Coaxing Czar.  Unfortunately, not even the Obama administration could afford lobster and cheescake for the 100 million or so air travelers in America each year, so onto plan B.

There are two main types of body scanners going right now.  These machines reveal what’s going on between clothing and skin.  Any foreign objects are visible.  Of course, your private regions are also visible.  This is the part that gets some people angry.  I say some because a CBS News poll shows that only 15% of Americans disapprove of full-body scanners at security checkpoints. 

The images are supposed to be transmitted to a TSA screener in a private viewing area.  That’s the key to eliminating the uncomfortable and personal connection by the way.  According to the TSA, faces are blurred and images can not be saved.  Well, except for those 35,000 images that were saved from 2008, but that’s all been fixed I’m sure.

The Controversy

Under the new guidelines, you must undergo the full-body pat down if you opt out of the scanner.  This experience is being reported more and more as the days roll by with next week’s Thanksgiving travel rush expected to reveal many more accounts.  You’re basically getting a very hands on experience under all clothing complete with more cupping than you’d find in a magic act.  The basic move seems to be sliding but I’ve also heard reports of squeezing and possibly twisting.  Cigarettes are not provided afterwards.