The Macho Man & My Life As A Writer

Image via Wikipedia

There comes a point in every little man’s life when he realizes that girls might have more potential than simply being gross. As far as I can remember, my first crush was on a celebrity named Miss Elizabeth–icon of World Wrestling Federation fame and former wife of Randy “Macho Man” Savage who died Friday after suffering a heart attack that caused him to lose control of his vehicle and collide with a tree.

Who could ever forget Macho Man’s signature phrase, a simple yet unforgettably raspy “Oooooh yeah.”

Clearly displayed against a blur of forgotten childhood is a night in 1988 when my rabbit-eared, bedroom TV displayed an NBC special called the WWF Saturday Night Main Event. That show aired occasionally throughout the late 80s in place of Saturday Night Live.

I probably wasn’t supposed to be awake or watching, but how could I miss the debut of The Mega Powers? That tag team featured the greatest combo in history, Hulk Hogan and “Macho Man” Randy Savage. They were managed by Miss Elizabeth.

Long story short, my guys were taking on the hated “Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase and Andre the Giant who had turned over to the dark side.  The guest referee was future Governor Jesse “The Body” Ventura.

The culmination of the match came as Hogan and Savage were both out of the ring and knocked senseless. The ref Ventura was supposed to be counting them out but got distracted when Miss Elizabeth stunned every 10-year-old boy in my house by peeling off her yellow skirt to not quite reveal the equivalent of red bikini bottoms.